[Arashi] Lost In Translation
Jun. 2nd, 2014 06:00 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
neko_kirin3104Title: Lost In Translation
Group/Pairing: Arashi/Yama Pair (Ohno/Sho)
Prompt: Language
Word Count: 1066
Rating: PG-13
Genre: Humor
Summary: Yama pair is caught in a petty misunderstanding. The kaze trio find themselves caught in between.
Note: Inspired by a prompt from![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-community.gif)
rainbowfilling, that Yama moment at 2014.05.30 Mini Station, and partly by Nino’s habit of repeating Leader’s mumbled words for everyone’s benefit (I love Nino more and more for it). XD
All sorts of interesting things happen in the Arashi green room; behind closed doors and sound proof walls, where they could just be their raw, petty, and uncensored selves—
“Did Leader just say Sho-chan’s butt broke?” Aiba asked, looking seriously troubled. He had just put his phone down to focus on the on-going forum.
“I thought this was about Leader’s hand breaking?” Jun frowned at Aiba’s ill-timed perversion.
“I don’t know,” Nino mumbled. Never one to relinquish his games for anything, he kept his eyes and hands glued on his phone. “I’m only hearing senseless drones from over here.”
The tension in the air was so thick between the two older members that afternoon that one could easily get knocked out by it for just being there.
“Signal’s not getting any better right here either,” Jun remarked, throwing a sideway glance at a pouting Sho beside him.
“Leader broke something!” Aiba insisted.
“No, I didn’t,” Leader grumbled.
“Oh, yes you did!” Sho quipped.
“So, is your butt broken then, Sho-chan?”
Jun whacked Aiba’s head.
“So is your butt broken then, Sho-chan?” Nino reiterated with a sneer, earning a delighted hoot from Aiba, and a harder smack on Aiba’s head from Jun.
“How the hell can a butt break, seriously?!”
“But Leader’s hand doesn’t look broken either, look!” Aiba pointed across the table at Leader, already falling half-asleep beside Nino.
Nino slapped the Arashi patriarch’s forehead, jolting the man’s drifting consciousness back to earth.
“What the—?!”
“Did you break Sho-chan’s butt, Leader?”
Jun sent another whack flying Aiba’s way. “Idiot!”
“No.”
“Is your hand broken then?” Nino finally put his phone down to forcibly grab and examine the older man’s hands. “Nope. Same old hands.” He slapped them both on the table, making the man wince and grunt in pain. “Not broken at all.”
“So, what is this all about then?” Jun’s patience was starting to wear thin.
“Satoshi-kun broke my plate!”
“What?!” All three pairs of incredulous eyes converge on Sho.
“This is all about a plate?” Nino’s patience was rapidly evaporating with Jun’s.
“Eeh?! How many plates do you have at home, Sho-chan?” For some reason, Aiba looked and sounded betrayed.
“He broke the plate at my door,” Sho crossed his arms over his chest with a huff. “The one where I empty my pockets on when I come home.”
“It broke because you sat on it!” Satoshi crossed his own arms over his chest in a look of defiance. “Your butt broke the plate, Sho-chan!”
“Ah, so that’s how it was,” Aiba remarked, banging his fist to his palm in a eureka gesture. “Hm-hm.”
“I wouldn’t have sat on it if you didn’t...!” Sho sat back on his haunches and shifted his eyes uncomfortably.
Jun frowned. “Didn’t what?”
“What didn’t Leader do?” Nino turned a suspicious glance at the older man beside him.
Sho bowed his head and mumbled in reply.
“What?” Jun leaned closer to get a better reception.
Sho mumbled again, slouching deeper in embarrassment.
“Wait, what?!” A faint shade of pink was beginning to touch Jun’s cheeks.
“Sho-chan said Leader’s hands were all over him before they can even close the door,” Aiba said for everyone’s benefit. “You’re good-looking Jun-kun, but you’re really quite deaf sometimes.”
“That’s not what I said!” Sho shrieked, eyes huge and scandalized.
“Same difference.”
Jun let loose another whack.
Nino shrugged and picked his phone up. “Couldn’t you two have waited to get to the bedroom first?”
“Or the couch? Maybe the tub—?”
“Sho-chan had the stuffs on him,” Leader said, sounding too casual, almost bored.
“Huh?” All three incredulous eyes were on Sho again.
“Condoms and those retail lubes. They were all over his plate.”
Jun cleared his throat. Aiba banged his fist to his palm again. Nino started snickering. They had been with the man for fifteen years, but Satoshi Ohno’s crude honesty would never stop surprising them.
“Dammit, Satoshi...” Sho was blushing to the tips of his ears now. Even his neck was turning red.
“Just buy him a new plate then, Leader,” Jun advised.
“He says I can never replace the sentimental value of the one that I didn’t break,” Leader sounded a little dejected this time, though never losing his stubborn ‘it’s-not-my-fault’ edge.
“I bought that on our first anniversary! I even drew our faces on it—!”
“Then just buy a new one and make new sentimental memories! Mou!” Aiba exclaimed, jokingly channeling his inner onee.
“Yeah. Sho-chan’s artwork is not much of a loss, anyway,” Nino scoffed.
“Hey!”
“Buy him a new plate, Leader.” Jun glared at the older man, his voice low and commanding.
Leader shrugged and snorted. “Fine.”
“And let Leader draw on it this time, Sho-chan,” Nino didn’t even bother with a glare.
Sho shrugged, wrinkled his nose and snorted. “Fine.”
“And the foyer table is not for having sex, you two!” Aiba practically yelled, slamming a palm on the table, like an impatient judge dismissing a trivial case.
Sho and Jun glared at him to shut up, their faces now an identical shade of red. Nino’s shoulder shook with his poorly restrained snickers. Leader’s head was starting to sag to his chest again.
A brief lull settled over them, during which Leader and Sho had more than once stolen a glance at each other. They didn’t need to say anything more for the tension in the air to gradually shift into something more favorable, though not any less thicker. It was making the younger members fidget in their seats.
“So... What can you say about all of this, Leader?” Aiba croaked.
“Such pettiness...”
“Leader says he loves you, Sho-chan.”
“I heard him, Nino,” Sho tried to sound unaffected and failed.
Jun rolled his eyes and pulled himself up to his feet. “Sho-kun says he loves you too, Leader.”
“Hn.” Satoshi narrowed his eyes at the trio and tipped his head in the direction of the door in a wordless gesture of dismissal.
“The green room is not for kissing and making up either! Mou!” Jun whacked Aiba’s head again and dragged the preaching man out of the room. Nino followed close by, somehow managing not to trip though he had his face practically stuck to his phone.
The door closed with a soft click.
And the more interesting things started happening.
Since, you know, Sho-chan had the stuffs in his pockets and all...
***Thank you very much for reading~! It is always appreciated~! <333
Group/Pairing: Arashi/Yama Pair (Ohno/Sho)
Prompt: Language
Word Count: 1066
Rating: PG-13
Genre: Humor
Summary: Yama pair is caught in a petty misunderstanding. The kaze trio find themselves caught in between.
Note: Inspired by a prompt from
rainbowfilling, that Yama moment at 2014.05.30 Mini Station, and partly by Nino’s habit of repeating Leader’s mumbled words for everyone’s benefit (I love Nino more and more for it). XDAll sorts of interesting things happen in the Arashi green room; behind closed doors and sound proof walls, where they could just be their raw, petty, and uncensored selves—
“Did Leader just say Sho-chan’s butt broke?” Aiba asked, looking seriously troubled. He had just put his phone down to focus on the on-going forum.
“I thought this was about Leader’s hand breaking?” Jun frowned at Aiba’s ill-timed perversion.
“I don’t know,” Nino mumbled. Never one to relinquish his games for anything, he kept his eyes and hands glued on his phone. “I’m only hearing senseless drones from over here.”
The tension in the air was so thick between the two older members that afternoon that one could easily get knocked out by it for just being there.
“Signal’s not getting any better right here either,” Jun remarked, throwing a sideway glance at a pouting Sho beside him.
“Leader broke something!” Aiba insisted.
“No, I didn’t,” Leader grumbled.
“Oh, yes you did!” Sho quipped.
“So, is your butt broken then, Sho-chan?”
Jun whacked Aiba’s head.
“So is your butt broken then, Sho-chan?” Nino reiterated with a sneer, earning a delighted hoot from Aiba, and a harder smack on Aiba’s head from Jun.
“How the hell can a butt break, seriously?!”
“But Leader’s hand doesn’t look broken either, look!” Aiba pointed across the table at Leader, already falling half-asleep beside Nino.
Nino slapped the Arashi patriarch’s forehead, jolting the man’s drifting consciousness back to earth.
“What the—?!”
“Did you break Sho-chan’s butt, Leader?”
Jun sent another whack flying Aiba’s way. “Idiot!”
“No.”
“Is your hand broken then?” Nino finally put his phone down to forcibly grab and examine the older man’s hands. “Nope. Same old hands.” He slapped them both on the table, making the man wince and grunt in pain. “Not broken at all.”
“So, what is this all about then?” Jun’s patience was starting to wear thin.
“Satoshi-kun broke my plate!”
“What?!” All three pairs of incredulous eyes converge on Sho.
“This is all about a plate?” Nino’s patience was rapidly evaporating with Jun’s.
“Eeh?! How many plates do you have at home, Sho-chan?” For some reason, Aiba looked and sounded betrayed.
“He broke the plate at my door,” Sho crossed his arms over his chest with a huff. “The one where I empty my pockets on when I come home.”
“It broke because you sat on it!” Satoshi crossed his own arms over his chest in a look of defiance. “Your butt broke the plate, Sho-chan!”
“Ah, so that’s how it was,” Aiba remarked, banging his fist to his palm in a eureka gesture. “Hm-hm.”
“I wouldn’t have sat on it if you didn’t...!” Sho sat back on his haunches and shifted his eyes uncomfortably.
Jun frowned. “Didn’t what?”
“What didn’t Leader do?” Nino turned a suspicious glance at the older man beside him.
Sho bowed his head and mumbled in reply.
“What?” Jun leaned closer to get a better reception.
Sho mumbled again, slouching deeper in embarrassment.
“Wait, what?!” A faint shade of pink was beginning to touch Jun’s cheeks.
“Sho-chan said Leader’s hands were all over him before they can even close the door,” Aiba said for everyone’s benefit. “You’re good-looking Jun-kun, but you’re really quite deaf sometimes.”
“That’s not what I said!” Sho shrieked, eyes huge and scandalized.
“Same difference.”
Jun let loose another whack.
Nino shrugged and picked his phone up. “Couldn’t you two have waited to get to the bedroom first?”
“Or the couch? Maybe the tub—?”
“Sho-chan had the stuffs on him,” Leader said, sounding too casual, almost bored.
“Huh?” All three incredulous eyes were on Sho again.
“Condoms and those retail lubes. They were all over his plate.”
Jun cleared his throat. Aiba banged his fist to his palm again. Nino started snickering. They had been with the man for fifteen years, but Satoshi Ohno’s crude honesty would never stop surprising them.
“Dammit, Satoshi...” Sho was blushing to the tips of his ears now. Even his neck was turning red.
“Just buy him a new plate then, Leader,” Jun advised.
“He says I can never replace the sentimental value of the one that I didn’t break,” Leader sounded a little dejected this time, though never losing his stubborn ‘it’s-not-my-fault’ edge.
“I bought that on our first anniversary! I even drew our faces on it—!”
“Then just buy a new one and make new sentimental memories! Mou!” Aiba exclaimed, jokingly channeling his inner onee.
“Yeah. Sho-chan’s artwork is not much of a loss, anyway,” Nino scoffed.
“Hey!”
“Buy him a new plate, Leader.” Jun glared at the older man, his voice low and commanding.
Leader shrugged and snorted. “Fine.”
“And let Leader draw on it this time, Sho-chan,” Nino didn’t even bother with a glare.
Sho shrugged, wrinkled his nose and snorted. “Fine.”
“And the foyer table is not for having sex, you two!” Aiba practically yelled, slamming a palm on the table, like an impatient judge dismissing a trivial case.
Sho and Jun glared at him to shut up, their faces now an identical shade of red. Nino’s shoulder shook with his poorly restrained snickers. Leader’s head was starting to sag to his chest again.
A brief lull settled over them, during which Leader and Sho had more than once stolen a glance at each other. They didn’t need to say anything more for the tension in the air to gradually shift into something more favorable, though not any less thicker. It was making the younger members fidget in their seats.
“So... What can you say about all of this, Leader?” Aiba croaked.
“Such pettiness...”
“Leader says he loves you, Sho-chan.”
“I heard him, Nino,” Sho tried to sound unaffected and failed.
Jun rolled his eyes and pulled himself up to his feet. “Sho-kun says he loves you too, Leader.”
“Hn.” Satoshi narrowed his eyes at the trio and tipped his head in the direction of the door in a wordless gesture of dismissal.
“The green room is not for kissing and making up either! Mou!” Jun whacked Aiba’s head again and dragged the preaching man out of the room. Nino followed close by, somehow managing not to trip though he had his face practically stuck to his phone.
The door closed with a soft click.
And the more interesting things started happening.
Since, you know, Sho-chan had the stuffs in his pockets and all...
#####
***Thank you very much for reading~! It is always appreciated~! <333
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2014-06-02 12:42 pm (UTC)fu fu fu....Let the imagination run wild!
Thank you for sharing ^0^
no subject
Date: 2014-06-03 02:12 am (UTC)Thank you very much for reading and commenting~! <333
no subject
Date: 2014-06-02 06:26 pm (UTC)But their make up is always so sweet, even without saying a word, and of course what comes after....
Thanks for sharing!
no subject
Date: 2014-06-03 02:21 am (UTC)Thank you very much for reading and commenting~! <333
no subject
Date: 2014-06-02 10:18 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2014-06-03 02:27 am (UTC)Thank you very much for reading and commenting~! <333
no subject
Date: 2014-06-03 01:15 am (UTC)Thanks for writing, as always! I love your humor fics <3
no subject
Date: 2014-06-03 02:29 am (UTC)Thank you very much~! That really means a lot <333
no subject
Date: 2014-06-03 03:24 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2014-06-03 03:26 am (UTC)Thank you very much for reading~! <333
no subject
Date: 2014-06-03 02:30 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2014-06-05 11:00 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2014-06-04 04:45 am (UTC)but this one is too lovely to not comment.
love it. so much! and i love the last sentences. makes me wonder who's the pervert one here XD
thanks for sharing :)
no subject
Date: 2014-06-05 11:02 am (UTC)Lol~! They probably all are perverts. XD
no subject
Date: 2014-06-04 04:53 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2014-06-05 11:02 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2014-06-06 07:40 pm (UTC)I'm sorry if it's mean of me but this really had me laughing! Bad idea to read in the office. =))
I really love your stories. You have those certain lines which are really, really funny and at the same time, it actually works for whoever's saying that line.
no subject
Date: 2014-06-23 06:09 pm (UTC)I do try to make them sound like how I imagine them to be from watching their variety shows. I am really glad to know that they work. Thank you very much~! ^____^<3
no subject
Date: 2014-06-08 06:58 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2014-06-23 06:12 pm (UTC)Thank you very much~! ^___^<3